I can't stand living anymore?
Topic: Solving problem with system approach
June 19, 2019 / By Devan Question:
I just can't do it anymore - I had so many aspirations but ever since getting into college, they have been flushed down the drain. I wanted to become a doctor but apparently I'm too stupid and I can't produce sufficient grades in order to even apply to a medical school. That being said, my GPA is barely over 2.0 and I don't even party/drink/do any drugs whatsoever. I just go to classes and come home, sometimes bawling my eyes out because I happen to realize how much of a failure I actually am.
I am socially anxious and it's very difficult for me to make friends or even approach people to aid me in certain situations. How am I supposed to receive professor recommendations in order to progress into a medical/dental/graduate school when I'm too anxious to approach the professors? It's hopeless - I try my very best but I can never succeed. I'm an almost twenty year old virgin, I can't talk to women, I can't do well in school ... I basically can't do anything right. I'm even too scared to tell my parents what's wrong with me.
Suicide is my only option, right? I'm worthless - I don't want to live off of the welfare system or become a governmental leech - I want to be part of something. I want to contribute to society instead of just being a no good bum. What can I do? I'm a destined failure and my options are very limited.
Best Answers: I can't stand living anymore?
Candi | 6 days ago
That's very sad that you think so lowly of yourself, but so common, unfortunately.
When people feel down and out, which you are clearly in the midst of, they forget the good they bring, and the natural talents they have, even if it's just to make people laugh, or to be a loving friend.
Everyone has a purpose in this life, you are not born to die, and certainly not this young.
Look, I can relate.
I became ill a year into high school, and it completely turned my world upside-down.
I lost friends, lost time, lost initiative, dreams, hope, happiness.
You're wallowing in self pity.
I say this out of empathy, not cruelty.
You need to pick yourself up, and find a way to feel useful in this world.
You want to be, it's clear, maybe too much so.
I think you put a lot of pressure on yourself. You add unnecessary stress.
Whether or not you also get it from outside influences, is unclear, but irrelevant really. You need to give yourself a break.
You're having a rough go at it, but it could be so much worse then this, please trust me.
Suicide is a cowardly way to go. I've contemplated it myself, DON'T do it. Just don't.
I'm not a religious woman, but you don't know what's out there. You have options here, people who can help you.
You're making yourself feel very alone, it's apparent in your words.
If you're comfortable with your parents, talk to them.
If not, find someone who you can be honest with.
You're struggling, don't suffer alone, you don't need to.
Now, to address your specified issues.
Women: Okay, you're not a smooth-talker, so be it.
You seem to be uncomfortable in your own skin,
that's the root of a lot of this animosity towards yourself.
Make small changes in your appearance, as I'm sure you being a human being, you're not liking something there. Doesn't need to be drastic. Buy some new clothes, get a hair cut. I know it sounds cliche and typical, but it is for a reason, because it helps. Don't compare yourself to other people, well, to the extent where you're hating yourself for not being the same as someone else. Everybody has problems, you have to deal with the hand you're dealt, not wish for a better one, or give up. Solves nothing.
Understand what you want out of life.
Know that you have to EARN what you want, it won't just come to you.
Accept that you're not perfect, and grades may not come easily to you.
Doesn't mean you aren't intelligent.
You are, you show that through your words. Relax.
You are in a hole. You've hit rock bottom.
You can either lie down and die, or climb your way out.
👍 120 | 👎 6
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Originally Answered: I'm done! I can't stand living anymore?
Ik life can be hard. No body said this life would be easy.
We all go through our valleys. (hard times) but it's in the valley we grow. God molds us in the hard times as well as the good. Listen to skillets song "never surrender" (best one ever),listen to some worship music,pray,pray,pray and well keep pressing on take every day a step at a time. Then before you know it you will be back on the mountain (good times) you will go through a lot of valleys in you life. But it's worth don't you want to see what God has in store for you?
Then what's all this talk for. Go to God and pray and he will help you. Ik that you know that. So please. Never give up on life. Bc you will be missing out on so much. And as it was said by somone else. Think of all the people you would be leaving. Do u really want to put them through pain like that?
Medication helps reprogam your brain to a new view. It programs the subconscious with the aid of new ideas and new understandings of how life works. Actually the subconscious part of the brain reached through intuitition knows what to do all the time and gets around our programing. That's pretty much the secret to life. You can start by looking up Emotional Intelligence and go from there. Community clinics usually have a sliding scale program. I got weekly visits and free meds for twenty dollars a month. Counseling is for smart people, most everyone can use it. I wouldn't let the day pass. Most of the time we talk ourselves out of what to do. That's the whole problem, thinking too much and not feeling and understanding feelings enough. People don't know how to pray right. You have to listen for the answers that come to you and ask a lot of questions. If you don't listen to the answers that come to you then what's the point? Most people can't take the pressure and stress kills. Most, however use their intuition more and can get by. When they use it well they prosper. "Go within or you go without."
👍 40 | 👎 0
you are not worthless.. i know how you feel and honestly you will be okay. just work thru it.. personally i think that committing suicide is the most selfish thing someone can do .. think about the people that you would leave behind.. just imagine it ..
what if being a doctor isn't right for you? and your options are ENDLESS .. not limited.. have you ever thought about maybe going to a therapist.. i know u probably don't want to but they can really help people out.. i think about going to one myself... and hey you are doing a great thing .. you are going to college !!! to be a doctor !! WOW .. that is amazing in itself.. if you truly want to be a doctor than you can definately finish it out.. just stick with it and then the feeling after school you will get will be priceless.. if you dont want to be a doctor anymore that is fine.. don;t feel like a failure.. maybe you were meant for somethnig else !!
and don't worry about the ladies.. there are so many girls who have the same problem as you too ! and there are many almost 20 yr. old virgins.. imagine how special it will be to find one and wait together til you are married.. you seem like an awesome man with a good head on your shoulders.. don't worry .. stick it out and all the pieces will come together.. it is okay !!!
ps when i am upset i will wash my face with cold water.. sometimes makes me feel better.. and crying is good for the soul!!!
👍 35 | 👎 -6
Aww :( That's not really fair.
Well if you can't make it to be some professional or something, you can always do something physical (: Like building etc? It may be a put off, but i don't think suicide should be an option. And if it must be, it should be at the bottom of the list, if it already isn't. Try go out there and see what you can do :) You don't have to be 100% smart to do everything ;)
Good luck ;D I hope you find something ^_^ Don't throw away your life pleasee!
Oh and by the way, this may sound like it's easy said but not easy do, but try and just march up to those professors, you've got nothing to lose :) Attempt to build your confidence :)
👍 30 | 👎 -12
Listen to me, 'You are a human being and your life is meaningful.' There are too many people who love you and who you love for you to take yourself from this world. You are too special. You are a unique expression of the love that the Universe has for itself and you are hear for that reason. I know life can be hard, really REALLY hard, but you can't give up now! I know you feel worthless but you are just depressed and you don't see that you are already offering a great deal to society just by being willing to give of yourself. Listen to me, 'There is a life-sustaining solution to every problem in your life.' Depression, social anxiety, and general malaise are all very treatable. Medication, therapy, and peer-to-peer support can work wonders. Sometimes I feel like a loser and a freak, but losers and freaks keep this planet going because you gotta be a little crazy, a little lonely, and a little f*cked up to feel things are worth taking. Never forget how special you are- even when you don't see it.
👍 25 | 👎 -18
Originally Answered: I CANT STAND IT ANYMORE?
Of coarse they care about you.. but you know what, they care about their practice, their paycheck and their livelihood more..
Having said that, of coarse they care about complaints that patients have, they care if patients show non-confidence at their facility and they care about their reputation when a complaint finds its way to the newspapers and others media..
What you should do is to handle the matter wisely.. test the waters before you jump in..
First, you can voice up your complaints to the therapist in the next visit, but try to be as calm as possible.. because anger and threats are not usually well received.. explain to them that you feel prosecuted by the therapist and by the doctor who laughed at you, and watch for their response..
Therapists are human beings as well, they do make mistakes, get stressed out from their work and make fun of people.. you just need them to understand that their remarks are NOT acceptable and that they are hurtful..
That some of their comments are demeaning, insulting and hurtful..
Its kinda like middle school all over again.. I was bullied back when I was 10 or 12 years old, i was the only foreigner at that school, but i managed to push back.. i guess i was lucky enough that i didn't push hard enough to get me in trouble with the school board..
Take a stand but don't be hard-headed about it.. but if you feel that your voice is falling on deaf ears.. try voicing up against, and try again.. after exhausting several trials, you can voice up your complaints and start to threaten to write to the administration.. most employees wouldn't want to have complaints in their records, hopefully that would solve most of your problems..
But if they're still unmoved by your threats.. you write to the admin regarding your complaints.. they will take your complaints seriously, and it will be in someone's record.. but understand this, if you do such a thing, things may back fire at you: the therapist may refuse to see you claiming you to be "difficult".. and they may even be more mean to you, in regards to your treatment, for making a complaint against their co-workers..
Similarly, if you ever decide to voice up to the local newspaper and other media; you may risk losing the services at that facility..
Just like in middle school.. its a continuous hazing process.. people will continue to push your buttons every time you go there, its an inescapable truth in every hospital, clinic or facility on Earth..
you need to select your battles carefully, and escalate only when you have exhausted all the peaceful options.. You need to learn which bridges to burn and which one to keep..
Just think twice before you burn something..
All the best, and good luck..